Diagnosed With Love

Song and video's not mine.

Will the day I hold her hand ever come?

I read this on a paper I found on the couch. It made me think about it too. Will that day ever come?

My sister entered the room and she yelled at me for touching her things without her permission. I keep forgetting that I shouldn’t touch someone else’s things without letting them know first. I made a mental note about that.

I entered my room instead, a bit disappointed about my behavior.

I sat on my bed, and looked around for something to do. I saw my laptop on the table near the window. I stood up and moved towards it. Before opening it, I checked if it was really mine. Mine looks a lot like my sister’s and I didn’t want to upset her twice today. I saw the familiar letters on the side: j-a-y. It’s mine alright.

This thing never fails to amaze me until now. You could store files and even songs and videos! How neat.

I went through my files and found the unfinished project I’ve been working on for years now.

~

I hit the play button. I just love how this button is designed. If I want to hear what the music file is, all I have to keep in mind is that the symbol always points to the right. Play. Right.

Then the familiar piano introduction started to play.

It’s a masterful melody, when she calls out my name to me. As the world spins around her, she laughs, rolls her eyes, and I feel like I’m falling but it’s no surprise~

The memory of you came rushing back. We were childhood friends, and I first met you at the playground. I was sulking at a swing (that’s what you call the seat with ropes attached to it, right?) and you smiled at me and asked for my name. I couldn’t forget how you repeated my name. The sound of your voice was melodic.

The song changed. A guitar acoustic.

I know I’m young but I know love. And I know I’d know an angel if I saw one~

I loved how you looked when we had a play at school then. You were the angel. Good thing I was the one holding the ladder you were sitting on. I was the one closest to you. I got a close-up view on my angel on earth.

The song changed.

Cause the spaces between my fingers are right where yours fit perfectly~

I stared at my hand; the long fingers and at the lines in my palm. I realized just now that I didn’t have the chance to hold your hand ever. But I’m still hoping I’ll be able to.

The song changed.

Finally found the nerve to confess that it’s you, I want. Don’t care if I act a fool. I would damn near beg for you. Put aside all my pride. So don’t keep me hanging here cause this boy is falling stupid for you~

Even if this song’s quite jolly, I keep remembering the nightmare I had the day I tried to confess to you. I picked flowers from the backyard (and mom doesn’t know up to this day) and put on my new shirt. I saw you in school but Mom and teacher pulled me away. They told me I had to drop out of school and that I would be attending another school instead. I didn’t understand why I was asked to. Mom told me I was special, and that I could learn better in my next school. When I got out the office, our classmates mocked me and called me stupid. They said I was stupid that’s why I had to attend another school. I was stupid alright. Stupid for you.

I’m in love. And I’m terrified.

When this realization hit me, I was terrified. How could I ever tell you that? I have nothing to give you. Besides, we don’t see each other anymore now. Mom told me you’re far away, studying. Why do you have to go that far? Did I scare you? Am I that hideous?

Every night since then, this song keeps repeating in my heard before I go to sleep.

Let me sleep, for when I sleep I dream that you are here. You’re mine. And all my fears are left behind. So let the moon shine softly on the girl I long to see. And maybe when she dreams, she’ll dream of me~

I chose to end this medley with these lines which serve as my prayer for you.

May the angels protect you, trouble neglect you.

Heaven accept you, when it’s time to go home

May you always have plenty, your glass never empty.

May your tears come from laughing, you find friends worth having. With every year passing, they mean more than gold.

May you ever stay humble, smile more than grumble.

And know when you stumble, you’re never alone.

You’re never alone alright. You have God. You have me.

Just then my Mom stormed into the room.

“Jay? We have to go now,” she smiled at me, though I could tell she was more giddy inside.

“Where are we going?” I got up.

“To your new doctor,” excitement filled her eyes. I closed my laptop and neared her.

“Who’s the new doctor?”

“I think her first name’s Andrea,” she winked. I smiled.

Neat. You and my new doctor have the same name. I wonder if she’s anything like you. I wouldn’t know if I didn’t come to her now, right? Mom pulled my hand as I followed after her.

As we exited my room, I heard a song playing in the living room.

All I know is that you are the cure, cause I’ve been diagnosed with love.

I’m coming Dr. Andrea!

MVJLO 04.19.11

Happy birthday kuya!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The songs were:

-Hello by SHINee

-Out of my league by Stephen Speaks

-Gentlemen Don’t by Gabe Bondoc

-Vanilla Twilight by Owl City

-Stupid for you by Marie Digby

-Terrified by Katharine McPhee

-Dream of me by Kirsten Dunst

-Never Alone by Jim Brickman and Lady Antebellum

-Diagnosed with Love by Chris Brown